I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
