i jhust puked up my retainher.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
