Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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