If i come over, it means nothing
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
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don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
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When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head