Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
