I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
It was a blind-side dick pic.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize