Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
