he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
two words: eviction party
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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