she was so not down for the gang bang
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
