Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
It's shark week go big or go home
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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