So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize