I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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