This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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