Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
