The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
