i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Randomize
