just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
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