i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
