i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
