Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I need to align my fucking chakras
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