What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize