If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Randomize
