great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
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