I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
