I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
