I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
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