I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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