I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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