do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Randomize
