You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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