Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
