Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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