Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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