I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
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