Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
