I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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