I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
