$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
