he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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