how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
