Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Randomize
