Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
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