We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
