4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize