watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
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