i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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