i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
