I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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