think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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