If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
