& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
